 5 Surprising Revelations About Stay-at-Home Dads
We like to believe that society is improving. The conversation around gender roles is more intense than ever. Workplaces are embracing flexibility, and families are adapting to a new world. While we celebrate the increasing number of fathers seen at school pickups and pushing strollers in the park, the Australian Institute of Family Studies has released a study that shows the progress of stay-at-home parenting is not as widespread as one might think.
SAHDs (or stay-at-home fathers as they are sometimes called) are often held up to symbolize a changing tide. Are there more women in the workplace? Great. What about dads taking on caregiving roles? Even better. The truth is nuanced, and data shows how far we still have to go until shared parenting becomes a norm.
The study revealed five surprising and revealing findings. We also discuss what these insights tell us about Australian Families today.
1. Even Today, Stay-at-home Dads are Still Incredibly Rare
Let’s start by defining what we mean when we say stay-at-home dad”. According to the Australian Institute of Family Studies, a father who is at home with his child is one who is in a heterosexual, two-parent family and does not work (even part-time). The partner of the father is either a full-time or part-time worker.
You might think that SAHDs were becoming more prevalent because of all the articles praising “modern fatherhood”. Here’s what’s surprising: They’re not.
The number of Australian dads who stay at home has barely changed over the last decade. In 2011, SAHDs made up just 4% of two-parent households. In June 2016, how about? Still 4%.
This is important. The number of two-parent families has remained the same in five years, despite workplace changes, parenting podcasts, and viral TikTok videos. In the meantime, 31% of two-parent households are still made up of stay-at-home mums.
This shows that in Australia, traditional roles still play a major role in the way we organize family life. While dads do a lot of the school pick-ups and reading bedtime stories to their children, full-time childcare is still mostly done by women. If you know a dad who stays at home, praise him. He is in the minority.
2. There’s No One-Size-Fits-All Solution for Dads Who Stay at Home
Stay-at-home dads are often pictured as men who have purposefully and consciously stepped out of paid employment to become full-time caretakers. This is the exact opposite role from that of a stay-at-home mum. The study shows that this isn’t always true.
There is a wide range of circumstances among dads who stay at home full-time. Some dads are on the job market and are actively seeking work. Others are at home because they have chosen to be there.
It is important because it shows that not all SAHDs are part of a radical and deliberate shift in values. Some SAHDs are dealing with job losses or employment issues. Some are temporarily home. Some people choose to remain at home while their partners work, but they are still a minority.
This shift in many cases isn’t about equality or preference. This shift may be due to practicality, financial restrictions, health concerns, or the availability of child care. It is not as simple as flipping the script to achieve more equal parenting roles.
3. Many Stay-at-home Dads Don’t Care for Babies
The report reveals some surprising findings, including the impact of age on who stays at home.
We tend to assume that stay-at-home parents, especially those who do not work, are at home with their babies and toddlers. This is not the case for most stay-at-home dads.
Only 21,2% of SAHDs have children between the ages of 0 and 2 years. Over half (53%) are at home with their children between 0-2 years.
The numbers change once the children reach the age of six years or older. Over 57% of stay-at-home dads have school-aged kids, whereas only 26.5% are mums.
Mothers are the primary caregivers for very young children who need full-time care. Later, when demands change, dads are more likely than mums to be the primary caregiver. More school lunches, fewer nappy changes. Less rocking in bed, more pick-ups after school.
Why is there a gap? This could be due to personal preferences, limitations in workplace policies, social expectations, or even confidence. It can be daunting to care for a new baby. Without strong parental leave policies, which support both fathers equally and are supportive of all parents, many men do not feel empowered or equipped to take on the responsibility.
4. Stay-at-home Dads Use Their Time Differently
Let’s discuss what happens in homes where dads are the primary caregivers. Spoiler alert: It’s not the same as what happens when mums stay at home.
The study found that stay-at-home mums spent an average of 37 minutes per week caring for their children. The average stay-at-home mum spends 37 hours per week doing housework, making it a full-time job.
Stay-at-home fathers, on the other hand, spend an average of 19 hours a week on childcare and 28 hours a week on household chores.
That’s a significant difference–especially in child care hours.
As we said earlier, the age of children is a major factor. The SAHDs tend to care for older children who require less attention. Even after accounting for this, men and women still have different approaches to the role.
The study looked at parenting activities in particular. The two main responsibilities of fathers in families where dads stay at home were:
- Staying at home with a sick child
- Drive children to and from the activity
In the meantime, parents would share tasks such as playing with their children and putting them to sleep.
What is the one thing that all mothers have to do? Dressing your children.
Yes, even in 2025, the job of dressing children is still done by mothers.
It may seem like a minor thing, but it is revealing. Even in households with a dad who stays at home, these micro-divisions show that gender roles still influence how tasks are allocated, whether consciously or unconsciously.
5. The Good News? The Good News?
Not all is gloomy. The study found that the public’s perception of reality is catching up with the public’s perception.
Today’s parents support SAHDs more than they did 50 years ago, when the sight of a male changing a baby’s diaper or pushing a stroller might have raised some eyebrows. According to the study, most Australians agree that children are raised just as well in families where fathers are the primary caregivers.
This change in attitude is significant. This means there is cultural support, which gives future families confidence to do whatever works for them, whether that be mum staying at home, dad remaining at home, or both parents working flexible hours and sharing caregiving equally.
Now the challenge is to turn this cultural acceptance into a practical reality.
This means:
- Access to paternity leave
- Child care is now more affordable
- Both parents can work together in the same workplace
- Normalising dads to be the default caregivers
Real change is not only achieved when people adopt an idea but also when the systems that support it are in place.
Conclusion
The image of a stay-at-home dad is appealing. What if a man could confidently negotiate nap times, snacks, and school pick-ups with his partner while he climbed the corporate ladder? That’s progress.
The Australian Institute of Family Studies reminds that, even though this image is slowly gaining acceptance, it’s still not the norm.
Only 4% of families with two parents have a father at home all the time, despite the changing cultural landscape. These dads don’t all look the same. Some dads are at home because they want to be, while others do so out of necessity. The majority of them do not have babies. They spend less time on childcare and more on household chores than mums.
There is still reason for optimism. Attitudes change. Dads want to participate more. Wants more families to share the burden differently. It’s not hard to create an equal parenting society. We just need the will, the policy, and the culture reinforcement.
Here’s to all the dads who drop off their kids, cook dinner, and referee homework. And to those who fight gender stereotypes the fathers they want to become. Each SAHD is helping to pave the way for future generations of boys and daughters who will know that parenting doesn’t have a gender. It’s all about love, commitment, and being present.
We can all agree on that.
