When It Feels Like Everything Going Backwards

Parenting is full of setbacks, which can be frustrating. This is especially true in the first few months and years. Even the most confident of new parents can be left questioning their parenting skills when faced with sleep regressions or feeding problems, clinginess or emotional overload. You’re certainly not alone, and you are not doing anything wrong. This guide will help you through those difficult days by providing practical advice, encouragement and a reminder that setbacks do not mean failure. These setbacks are part of your journey.

Here Are Some Tips on How to Cope With The Situation

1. One step forward, two steps back

Sleep regression is the sudden, unexplained changes in your baby’s sleeping habits. Sleep regression occurs when your baby, who was once a peaceful sleeper, starts to wake up frequently, resist naps or stay awake for long periods in the middle night. You feel like your progress is gone overnight.

Sleep regressions aren’t usually due to illness, discomfort, or teething (although these can be factors). They are usually linked to significant developmental leaps. As your baby grows, their brain and body undergo huge changes. Sleep is often affected during these times.

Age and Stages of Sleep Regression

Sleep regressions are more common around developmental milestones during the first two to three years of life. Some regressions are more severe than others, and not every baby will reach all of these milestones. Here’s what you can expect:

2. 6 Weeks: Awakening the World

Around six weeks old, babies start to become more aware of their surroundings. The sleepy newborn phase is starting to fade. Your baby suddenly seems more alert, hungry, and fussy.

Parents can become exhausted by this shift. It may seem like you are meeting a new baby, one who is more demanding and needs less sleep. This change is a sign that your child is growing and becoming more aware.

3. Three to four months: the toughest time.

It’s no accident that the 4-month sleep regression has become legendary. This is often the first major sleep regression that parents experience. It can be difficult. Your baby’s brain is changing, as are their sleep patterns and their sensitivity to stimuli. This means that they are waking up more frequently and have trouble getting back to sleep.

Sleep disturbances can also occur when babies start to roll over or develop new motor skills. Some old tricks, such as rocking and feeding babies to sleep, may no longer be effective. If you’re starting a new bedtime routine, it may be necessary to start from scratch.

4. 6 Months: Busy Babies, Restless Sleep

Many babies are already on the move by six months. This increase in activity, whether they are rolling, scooting or crawling, makes it difficult for them to relax. As they test out their new skills, they may resist being swaddled or turn and toss.

Another growth spurt can also occur at this time. This is especially true if you are transitioning your baby to solids. All of these factors can cause sleep disturbances even if the baby had been sleeping well before.

5. Standing room only for 8-10 months

This phase, which is known by parents as the “9-month sleep regression,” is marked by milestones such as standing up and moving along furniture. Your baby may practice his new skills throughout the night.

Nighttimes can be filled with banging the crib around or standing up to cry. At this stage, the baby is often too excited to fall asleep easily. This makes it more difficult for parents to soothe their child.

6. Twelve Months: A Toddler is Near

Many babies start to walk around the time they turn one, or show signs of it. This newfound independence can disrupt the sleep schedule.

Your baby may be preparing for their first steps, even if they haven’t yet. Sleep is often put on the back burner during this phase of preparation. They are too busy achieving this huge milestone to sleep properly.

7. 18 Months – Toddler Emotions

Your child may experience separation anxiety by the time they reach 18 months. Bedtime suddenly becomes a struggle. Your baby, who was once a sleepy one, may now cry out or call for you more often.

This is a particularly challenging regression because your child is now more aware of the situation and can begin to push limits. The communication skills of your child are improving, but still not enough to be able to communicate exactly what they want. It can cause frustration for both you and your child.

8. Two Years: The Final Hurdle

It can seem like sleep regressions are endless at the age of two. Your toddler may stop taking naps during the day or refuse to go to bed. You may experience fears, such as fear of the darkness or monsters. Sleep can be a challenge when there are so many changes in a child’s life (potty-training, moving to a toddler bed or the arrival of another sibling).

Many parents can feel discouraged at this stage, as they feel that they are back to square one. This stage is also the end of typical sleep regressions. There is relief in sight.

We All Fear The Baby Sleep Regression

Sleep regression is a term that every new parent fears. You have spent weeks, or even months, trying to establish a routine. You’ve endured sleepless nights and paid your dues with midnight rocking sessions. Finally, your baby is sleeping soundly. You think you have finally made it. Just as you start to feel more confident and your energy level starts to rise, your baby begins waking up again, sometimes hourly. It’s as if everything has gone backwards.

How to Deal with Sleep Regressions?

You may feel overwhelmed by sleep regressions, but with patience, consistency and flexibility, you can overcome them.

Babies (Younger Than 18 Months)

• Evaluate your methods of settling your baby. Consider whether these are sustainable over the long term. Regressions are a sign that your baby may have outgrown these needs.

• Keep to your routine.

• Provide comfort to your child without rearranging the system. Respond to your child’s needs when they are experiencing regressions. However, avoid creating new habits that may be difficult to break in the future (such as bringing your baby into your bed) if this is not what you want to do.

• Be patient. Sleep regressions can be temporary. Most sleep regressions resolve themselves within a couple of weeks. Do not rush into making major changes unless you are experiencing a persistent problem.

• Talk with others. Sometimes, venting your frustrations to another parent can be a lifesaver. You are not alone.

Toddlers (18 months and up)

• Establish clear boundaries. Children are more intelligent than we realise and thrive with structure. Set clear limits for bedtime, and adhere to them with calm consistency.

• Do not panic. Refrain from changing your sleep schedule the moment something goes wrong. Most regressions will resolve themselves, but if you change your sleep routine too soon, it can confuse you.

• Search for the underlying cause. Regressions can mask other problems, such as too much screen time, excessive stimulation before bedtime, or insufficient physical activity throughout the day. Look for lifestyle factors that could interfere with your sleep.

• Keep calm and be consistent. Toddlers are attracted to your energy. Your anxiety or inconsistency can increase their restlessness. Your tone should be calm and clear. Keep your bedtime routines simple.

• Comfort is the key. You can sit next to your toddler’s crib or even check on them every few minutes, if you feel they are struggling. It’s important to provide support while maintaining boundaries.

Conclusion

When you are experiencing sleep regressions, they can seem endless. However, this is a temporary phase. Sleep disruptions during your child’s first two years are normal. Even if you don’t see it, each regression is a sign that your child is making progress.

Be kind to yourself. You are doing your best with a tiny person who is learning and growing every day. You will get through the sleep regressions with love, patience and a bit of strategy.

You will eventually sleep again.